One day I will cut the cord…

This is a message to Time Warner Cable, my second-favorite cable service provider (all the others are tied for first):

Your days are numbered, bunky…

Your days of promotional rates that vanish in a heartbeat are numbered…

Your days of bugging me to bundle my cable and internet service with a phone service I’ll never use are numbered…

Your days of making me feel less like a “valued customer” and more like a “value of a consumer” are numbered…

And that number grew shorter last night.

Because last night, in a fit of insomnia, I woke up and decided to watch some of my favorite television shows.  You know, an hour of this or an hour of that, just to help me drift back into whatever dream I can’t remember I had.

Okay, fire up the Apple TV module.

Hey, wait a second – my Apple TV now says I can participate in the CBS All Access online network through the module?

Background.

Thanks to my Apple TV module, I can watch most of my cable and network shows on my own schedule.  If I want to watch Empire or Sleepy Hollow, there’s my FoxNow channel.  I’ve started watching a really funny comedy show, You’re The Worst, on the FX channel (along with the final season of The League, which has gone about two seasons past its freshness date).  And thanks to purchasing an a la carte subscription to HBO Now, I’ve enjoyed same-day watchings of True Detective, Game of Thrones and Last Week Tonight With John Oliver.

But now there’s CBS All Access?  Hmm…

I checked out the parameters for the program.  First week’s free, $6/month after that.  I get access to all of CBS’s primetime, late night and daytime programming.  Ooh, maybe I can catch up on what happened since the last time I watched The Young And The Restless years ago.  Yes, I know the punchline is “Later that afternoon, Cricket discovered that terrible secret…”

What else can CBS All Access provide me?  Ooh, there’s a slew of archival shows.  They’ve got Star Trek: The Original Series and all four of the non-animated Star Trek programs.  They have classic shows like Perry Mason, The Twilight Zone (hour and half-hour), Twin Peaks (wait, Laura Palmer’s killer was her father?), Beauty and the Beast (the good one with Ron Perlman as the Beast, not the crapola one that’s on now), Cheers, Wings, The Odd Couple, The Brady Bunch

Holy Edward R. Murrow, Batman…

Okay, let’s test things out.  I missed last night’s episode of CSI:Cyber, so let me find it on the CBS All Access channel… there it is, the episode that aired last night.  Limited commercial interruptions, but hey it’s that episode, nice and crisp and clear.

And after I finished watching that episode, I went back to my Apple TV channels and …

Wait, I can watch NBC shows, too?  NBC has a portal on the Apple TV channel lineup?

Not like there’s anything on NBC right now that would capture my fancy – not interested in that procedural about the tattooed girl, or the latest iteration of Mariska Hargitay’s hairstyle… wait, I can watch full episodes and sketches from over 40 years of Saturday Night Live with this channel?

Yes please…

And at some point I’ll probably sign up for Netflix and HuluPlus and a couple of other channels.  I will.

So what does this mean for Time Warner Cable?

You know what it means.  It means that at some point in time, I’ll call Time Warner Cable and tell them that I don’t need the big television cable package; I can operate with the limited cable TV package with only a few channels.  Budget trimmed.

And by ordering my program lineup a la carte, I don’t have to pay for channels that I never watch.  It’s the equivalent of getting charged for the safe in your motel room whether you use it or not.

Your days are numbered, Time Warner Cable.

And that number is more finite than ever.

Because one day I will cut the cord.

Oh wow, CBS All Access has Flashpoint episodes?  I loved that show back in the day… BINGE WATCHING TIME!!  Scuse me for a few hours … 😀

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3 thoughts on “One day I will cut the cord…”

  1. FX is only available to you via Apple TV since you’re a TW cable subscriber. Once you cut that cord, you won’t be able to access it. FX doesn’t (yet) offer an internet only offering.

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    1. Good point. At one time I was buying season passes for certain shows (like The League) through my iTunes subscription, and if it ever came to the point where I’d cut the cord completely, I could probably still buy You’re The Worst on a single-season subscription.

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